News quiz resolutions: What should our favorite newsmakers aim to do in 2024?


Dear quiz-takers,

Here are our 100% accurate, stunningly insightful predictions for 2024:

  • The days will get longer.
  • Then they will get shorter.

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Life is uncertain — even death is no longer a done deal. All we can do is the best we can with what we have.

Same for celebrities, be they human, animal, or artificially intelligent. They probably have New Year’s resolutions, too, and some don’t involve Ozempic! If you know (or can guess) what those resolutions should be, you might close out the year with an 11/11.

So, how well did you pay attention — to 2023?


The News Quiz

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