The Vicars of Vegetables

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• The Vicars Of Vegetables Find Poetry In The Garden

  Gardens can inspire smiles, tears, and sometimes, even poetry. Irwin Goldman and Jim Nienhuis are horticulture professors at UW-Madison. But in addition to their knowledge of all kinds of vegetables and growing conditions, they are also passionate about garden-inspired poetry. And their favorite style is the haiku.

  The start of this avocation isn’t clear. Nienhuis speculates that it may have just been a particularly bad day in the office. “I think there were some tears, and we thought ‘what can we do to lighten things up?’” Goldman credits Nienhuis with discovering the haiku format, the 5-7-5 syllable structure as being “therapeutic when you encounter the things you encounter when gardening.” Nienhuis agrees that gardening is not always easy. “There’s some suffering involved. It’s like a love affair with the earth. Because there are those moments of great passion and reward, and then there are moments of pain and loss. So it’s all there, really.” What better scenario to inspire poetry?

  WPR staff members were encouraged to put pen to paper and create some garden haikus. The results were quite impressive.

  Ideas Network announcer Dave Potratz wrote:

  Quicker than I thought

  Breaking through the soil

  My windowbox Radishes

  But Ideas Network fill-in host and producer Cynthia Schuster had a less positive experience in her garden:

  I squish my onions.

  My squash and eggplant won’t grow.

  There’s always next year.

  Al Ross is the host of the regional show Spectrum West from WPR’s Eau Claire bureau and says wistfully:

  There on my hands rest

  Two regular looking thumbs

  I wish they were green

  WPR regional manager in Eau Claire Dean Kallenbach decides to look on the bright side:

  What’s up with Charlie,

  Creeping all over my lawn?

  Well — at least it’s green.

  John Munson is the regional manager at our Superior Bureau. John says, “this was the first Haiku I ever wrote. Ever. In my life. Probably the last as well. By popular demand.”

  rain rain sun sun sun

  sun rain sun sun rain rain sun

  so the gardens grow

  Norman Gilliland is well-known as a WPR music and Old Timer Radio host on the News and Classical network, and Chapter A Day reader. This point in the summer inspires him:

  Summer showers wane.

  Grass grows slowly without rain

  So I mow no more.

  WPR Milwaukee regional manager Lisa Nalbandian put husband Michael Tange to work. He shares these two poems:

  Flowers in the spring

  Tomatoes grow in summer

  Don’t eat the green ones

  Picking some flowers

  And some fruit from the garden

  Oops, in the wrong yard

  But the Garden Talk listeners were not to be outdone.

  Listener Deb Plymouth wrote:

  Fussy hydrangea

  I want it to be blue

  How much coffee grounds?

  And listener Daniel sent a haiku that he calls “Better Boy”:

  Please turn red.

  Please turn red.

  Please turn red.

  I planted late… Stupid frost!

  Listener David shared this haiku about using the bounty of the garden:

  Oh! Making pesto

  listening to garden talk

  basil, garlic, oil

  Since square-foot and strawbale gardens have been topics on Garden Talk this year, gardening in small spaces has been on our minds. Lois in Oshkosh has this cautionary haiku to share:

  New raised bed this year

  I’ve created a monster!

  All planted too close!!

  Those who have heard the Vicars of Vegetables on the show over the years have likely heard them talk about their mutual dislike of eggplants. Listener Bill in Iron River seems to agree:

  Place eggplant on plank,

  cook at 410, one hour.

  Toss eggplant, eat plank.

  But others love it. Listener Raul on Facebook submitted the following:

  a pool of purple

  in an overcrowded yard

  abundant eggplant

  And Doug in Menasha waxes poetic about that same vegetable:

  Greatest of all plants

  purple, hue of royalty,

  eggplant, we hail thee!

  Of course, when we garden, it isn’t just vegetables and flowers. There are also trees and lawns. Matthew in Warren, IL said that every year, he plant 20 to 50 trees in the spring. This year, he had to do it by himself, inspiring this:

  Planting trees

  A hawk soars overhead

  My back is sore

  Certainly, other types of poems can evoke time in the garden as well.

  Listener Susan in Milwaukee shared:

  Rabbits in the lettuce patch

  Raccoons in the corn

  Chipmunks in the tomato plants

  Cabbage moths in the morn

  Birds in the berry patch

  I’m tired of this bull.

  My salad bowl is empty

  But my big stew pot is full.

  And listener Judy went even shorter than a haiku:

  Last year, saved my leaves.

  This year, garden has no weeds!

  Nienhuis and Goldman shared one of their favorites, in both English and Spanish, Ode to The Onion by Chilean poet Pablo Neruda. It’s proof that any vegetable can inspire lofty visions and delectable verse.